A Good Day To Forget Your Paste
by Spacensky
Summary: Puddles, pouring rain, city ambiance, and killing a possessed vendor. Is there honestly a better way to spend an afternoon with your enemy's sister?


**Hi guys! Wow! It's been a while!** **I definitly don't have some fics I'm ingoring ahaha** **I wondered what it'd be like for Zim to walk with Gaz home in the rain. I've been reading your reviews and I hope to fix some issues you all have been pointing out! I also want to start talking back with you guys, you all are so supportive! So I'll try my best to respond to every review I get from now on. So without further ado, here's my longest one-shot yet!**

Another boring day of middle skool class went by. If he remembered correctly, it was a "Two's Day" on Earth.

Zim was leaning on the pillars of the middle skool's entrance, waiting for the acidic rain to clear. When he first arrived on earth, the sight of children frolicking scared him beyond belief. But now, 2 years later, watching kids subject themselves to the radioactive substance somewhat amused him. Sure, their unintentional worship annoyed him immensely (he found out one of the side effects of going into the rain was developing a zombie-like servitude), but seeing their skin smoke as they ran about was entertaining. Zim sharply glanced behind him for the umpteenth time. Dib hadn't come out of class yet, and knowing his enemy, would seize the opportunity to sneak up behind Zim and push him down the skool steps. Though at this point, after waiting for 30 minutes for this rain to clear, he almost wished Dib showed up just so that he wouldn't be bored out of his mind. Zim loathed being bored, since boredom leads to an idle mind, and an idle mind is unacceptable! The irken academy drilled this motto into his mind. They taught the only solution to keep from idleness is being in a state of scheming or observation. Never shall the mind stray from the mission.

For a restless alien like Zim, that was nearly impossible.

"GRAH! Out of all the days to not put on paste, why did it have to be today?", Zim snarled as he shook his fists, "This pesky earth weather is so unpredictable! I will DOOM who ever is in charge of managing this ball of dirt's pathetic atmosphere!"

Zim crossed his arms and hunched his shoulders. He let out a low snarl as he tapped his foot on the ground.

He mumbled, "stupid earth weather grrr... give it a piece of my AMAZING mind maybe I could destroy the weather controller and... humans are stupid they deserve to be de-"

"No one on earth can control the weather you idiot. It's all in nature and stuff."

Zim jumped at the sudden reply. He quickly turned on the ball of his heel to see a slim, striking figure emerge from the front of the middle skool entrance. Zim lowered his shoulders in slight relief. He knew that for the most part, the Dib-sister was harmless if he said the right things. Still, he was on edge around her... she seemed to grow more powerful and scary with age. Zim eyed her cautiously as she came closer to the skool steps, and into the rain.

"I wouldn't step out in this rain human, the precipitation is especially heavy today. But if you wanna burn to a crisp, be my guest." Zim pompously teased.

Gaz slowed her steps and turned to face Zim. He hadn't incurred her wrath this time, but darn if he did get on her nerves. She slightly opened her eyes as a warning, staring into Zim's false eyes. He shuffle in panic, knowing that her eyes were a way of gauging how close she was to dooming him.

Satisfied with his squirming, Gaz said, "for your information, I brought an umbrella. Y'know, something to protect you from the rain? but I guess you wouldn't know since you're so bad at learning earth stuff anyway."

With that final remark, she turned back to the steps, opened her umbrella, and began to walk down towards the sidewalk.

Zim widened his eyes at her device. Yes, he was slightly angered by her response, but she had a protection device! And who knew how much longer he would have to wait for the rain to clear? And if she came out already, no doubt that Dib was close behind. Despite their animosity, they were always near each other. Zim recalled their relationship was known as "siblings" or something like that.

Zim deducted that it was up to his manipulative charm to obtain shelter under the "uhm-brelah", and began to make his way cooly towards Gaz.

"Hey! Hey spiky hair! Wait! waitwaitwaitaAAAUGH! YYEGHH!"

Gaz never stopped, but looked behind her to see Zim running through the rain like an idiot. He was flailing his arms, screaming at the top of his lungs. He was a good distance away but she could already smell his burnt skin. She groaned as he came closer, turning back to face her path. Maybe, she thought, he won't catch up. Unfortunately, Zim was fast. As he slowed his pace, his stomping feet caused some puddles to splash against her new jeans. She was more than ready to subject him to water related pain.

Gaz opened her eyes halfway, sending daggers down Zim's spine. He really was pathetic. She could already see some bone and weird slimy stuff run down his face—his blood?—as he panted much to heavily for her liking.

Gaz slowly began, "You wet my pants. They were new."

Zim audibly gulped and replied, "Eh... they'll dry?" He shrugged his arms apologetically, and brandished his nodules in attempt at pity.

She growled and stopped. She placed a hand on Zim's shoulder, ready to push him into the rain. From the corner of her eye, she saw Dib barely emerging the school. He was calling for her in that stupid squeaky voice, mentioning that she was the one to carry the umbrella for the two of them today. She saw him call around the skoolyard searching for her.

Gaz had to make a decision. She could give Zim his just desserts, but his scream would alert Dib and honestly, the ensuing fight would ensure that Gaz would come home soaked. She turned her gaze to Zim, and contemplated just how not-annoying he was willing to be in order to stay dry and walk back home.

She disliked Zim, but she could barely stand her brother. It was an easy choice. Still with her hand on Zim's shoulder, she guided him along to hastily leave from Dib's view.

"What are you doing, placing your tiny hands on my amazing shoulder?" Zim said

"Keep your voice down! Do you really want Dib to see you?" Gaz harshly whispered, and picked up the pace until they came to a run.

When Dib's nagging voice grew faint, they sighed in relief and slowed their jog to a normal pace.

The rain steadily drummed as they walked in tense silence. They both kept their eyes forward as they made their way along the sidewalk. The bumpy path soon gave way to sleeker cement as the two began walking down the bustling city district.

"Hey, don't you usually go down Fleetway off of Werdin to get home?" Zim asked aloud, rubbing his arms as he nervously bounced his gaze between the traffic of smelly, loud humans walking against and beside them.

Gaz turned her head to him quizzically, "You know what streets we take home? Creep."

Zim raised his voice definitely, "I take the same roads too human! I happen to live on the cul-de-sac a few blocks away from your stinky house!"

He crossed his shoulders in annoyance and—if he had to admit—cold from being nearly soaked.

"And I prefer the quiet neighborhoods instead of being surrounded by more humans in the city."

Gaz rolled her eyes at his whining, yet, sympathized with his discomfort. She replied, "Oh yeah, you live close. I get it, not wanting to be around people. They stink. Like in a literal sense. But anyways, if we take the neighborhood home Dib is bound to see us. Taking the route through this busy area guarantees that Dib won't find us"

"Hmm," Zim averted her eyes and looked forward. He brushed his sagging hair back to its pompadour style as best he could. He looked to the "sky scrapers" as a distraction, and shook his head. These were the tallest humans could build their structures? The living complexes from Xitsatohp made these buildings look… well, not tall. And they all were a boring color. No bright hues or flashy neon signs. Truly these humans were primitive in everything they did! And the way these streets were made did little to accommodate for smaller humanoids when it came to direction. He noticed as Gaz tiptoed occasionally, looking to the terribly not-flashy street signs for guidance. Back home, every street would have a memorable landmark, and the street signs would flash in every visible color. They came to a halt as a neon stop sign brightened the murky rain falling around it. A few people groaned in impatience as a crowd huddled together, hoping to get across by the next light. Zim looked to the street name above him; Irving.

"So you're taking me home first."

"No, I was thinking of going down Album Avenue so that I can get home first and leave you to run the rest of the way home." Gaz said as she let out a small grin.

"What I said was more of statement, Grunt. We are already on Irving, I'm certain we passed Album a few blocks ago." Zim began shivering and tried to tighten his crossed shoulders to avoid showing any weakness. He looked to see her shocked realization. He chuckled mockingly and turned back to the stop sign with a look of victory on his face.

Gaz quietly growled, she tightened her fist and squinted as she flushed. She tilted her umbrella to her right, so that Zim was left unsheltered in the rain for a brief moment before Gaz put the umbrella over both of them once more. Zim let out a yelp and turned towards her accusingly, and Gaz responded with blunt.

"For your information, Zim, I would have turned on Album if I could actually see over these...grrr _taller_ people."

The light finally turned green and the crowd began to walk down the street. Zim raised his eyebrows in... realization. That tone she used in regards to the other humans... he knew the inflections in her voice.

"So you don't like it when tall people hinder you from accomplishing your task?"

Gaz never replied.

"Understandable. If I also felt frustrated towards species for being socially and functionally superior than me based on heir height, I would say the same thing. But I don't. So nyeeh." Zim stuck out his tongue in jest.

 _That_ , Gaz thought, _was a little too honest for passive observation.  
_  
She growled, "Hey, you're short too! I mean, you barely are an inch taller than me—"

"Which means I am superior!" Zim quickly added,

"—So you probably feel the same way! And honestly I'm not insecure about my height. It's these lanky jerks that can get in the way of what I want to do sometimes. That's all." Gaz quickly finished.

"Sure."

"Yeah."

They passed an Electronik shop, a wall full of shiny new televisions showing the news for the afternoon. The overdressed weather forecaster announced the rain would continue until the following Thursday. A few angry humans walked against Gaz and Zim, yelling into their phones. The city ambience compensated for any awkward silence that would have settled between the two.

Still, the air felt stiff around them. Both cursed their psyche for letting out clearly false information about themselves, and their pride showed through their tight frowns at the idea they insinuated a shared a weakness.

I _am not weak,_ they both thought. _The sooner I get home the better. I can't stand this._

A fast food vendor was coming into view. He wore a faded yellow shirt that smelled like it hasn't been washed in months. Every time he twisted his torso and waved his arms to catch the attention of bystanders, his terrible body odor would waft around him. He yelled "Hey! You guys want some hot cats? They're like hot dogs but they're not made of dogs or melted meat! HellOOO WHO wants some? huh?"

Zim and Gaz cringed at his screeching voice, but tried to ignore him. Gaz pinched her nose in disgust, while Zim began gagging, seemingly more sensitive to his stench.

The vendor craned his neck down towards the two, and laughed, "Hey YOU KIDS! You want some hot cats for the SMALL price of 12 dollars?"

Both snapped their eyes open, their irises shrunken in exasperation.

"Condiments cost extra! I hope you're not SHORT on money for this limited offer Augh!"

They fumed in anger, their hands trembled, they furrowed their brows and growled. A dark aura pulsed around Gaz and six sharp, glinting metal legs slowly emerged from Zim's pak.

Take this curse from m—I mean, buy it! All at the MINUSCULE price of 12 dollars! you must be SMALL minded to pass this off—"

"SHUT UP!" cried the two, holding up their fists and casting aside their umbrella. Gaz lifted the vendor high above his stand through her aura, and Zim, unconcerned that his cover would be blown, hoisted himself into the air with his legs to meet the vendor face to face. With pure terror in his eyes, the vendor watched as the scary girl levitated to float besides Zim. Gaz tightened her telepathic grasp on him, and Zim swiftly wrapped one leg around his neck. He writhed in pain and struggled to breath an apology. Before the vendor turned purple, they hurled him into his hot cat stand in unison. The hot cat vendor scratched his hands against his neck, trying to escape Zims hold and Gaz's press. He muttered that the hot cats would devour him, he cried he couldn't breathe. He said something in an odd language unheard of by human ears. Zim and Gaz stayed unwavering, until they noticed he finally stopped struggling. Without flare, they swiftly hopped off his hanging back.

The people around them had stopped to watch in twisted curiosity, but began to cheer once they had finished their act. They each earned a pat on the back as they had been the only ones to finally get rid of the vendor. Apparently, he had been on that corner for years, crying for someone to buy his food, and not even the authorities could get him to leave.

"Yeah, ok, thanks. Now stop touching me." Gaz shoved the people aside as she reach for her umbrella.

"EUGH! Get your filthy human germy hands off me! I am Zim! Stay away!" Zim shrieked as he tried to shoo away their hands, and he began to smoke from exposure to the pouring rain.

"Ok, let's make a break for it." Gaz took a hold of his arm and dashed away from the street, running down the sidewalk to turn a sharp right. They stayed pressed against the wall until they could no longer hear the mob of people.

"I think the coast is clear."

"...We're on the sidewalk. Not a beach, human." Zim innocently remarked.

"No, I mean we can walk now. They're gone."

"Why must your human sayings elude me so?" Zim's voice quivered in frustration.

Gaz rolled her eyes as she motioned Zim to follow her. Back on the path, she took the opportunity to brush her now wet hair out of her eyes. She let out a snort. She really hated when her hair was down. It just didn't suit her.

"Really, I think it's useless to get all poetic like that. I don't know why you humans speak in metaphors. Bleaugh." Zim stuck out his long tongue in disgust before looking back at Gaz, asking "Hey, that levitation thing you did back there… can all humans do that?"

The umbrella twirled between her hands, the flecks of residual rain wetting those around them. Gaz didn't mean to bother anyone but… it was pretty funny. The question caught her off guard; no one had asked her that before. She didn't even question her abilities herself, she just accepted them. It was really weird that Zim of all people noticed. What was that even supposed to mean?

"Uh, I dunno. I can only do that when I'm really mad and stuff. I'm also thinking at my clearest when I do. I calculate the most vile way to incur my wrath upon those who dare to cross me. I feel myself boil in anger and focus all my thoughts on the subject. If I can't avoid them, I'll make them wish they never met me!" She clenched her fist as she paused to gather her thoughts again. She flushed at her rambling and cleared her throat before saying, "Uh, yeah I was just born with it."

Her swift but noticeable change in attitude confused Zim. Why did she have to be embarrassed over having pride in her abilities? It was almost impressive how passionate she became. Almost. Come to think of it, he had never seen her emote as much as she did today throughout the two years he's known her. He wasn't sure what to make of it. She was a human after all, so it was just… weird.

Zim responded ,"Hmm, you're so different compared to other humans. If I dare say, you're almost as competent as me. And saying that is a huge honor; I am Zim after all!"

Gaz chuckled, "Almost as competent? Pft, whatever helps you sleep at night."

"I assure you that I could have done better in killing theeAAAAHH!"

Gaz tilted the umbrella away from Zim for a moment, holding back a laugh. Zim fixed his pompadour for the second time as he snarled at her, quite literally fuming in anger.

The girl's grin grew large as she saw him struggle to fix his hair—honestly, he could do with a better haircut—and he barked, "what was that for?"

"Don't forget who's sheltering your space butt. You're at my mercy Zimmy, so you'd better watch what you say." she teased.

Zim gave her a defiant look and hopped on a puddle they were passing through. Gaz let out a shriek and immediately looked to her brand new jeans, which were starting to fade into a gross brown. She jerked her head to face Zim again, who had an evil grin plastered on his face.

"You're not the only one who has the ability to doom others, fuschia girl. Victory for Zim!" He cheered.

"And don't call me that! I am Zim! Ziiiim!" he added.

Gaz turned to face Zim and said, "Well, don't call me weird names like "Human purple" or "Grunt,""

She couldn't help but smirk as she mocked, "I am Gaz! Gaaaaz!"

"meeh," Zim waived his hands in dismissal, "I don't sound like that! I sound more, eh, cool and terrifying!"

Gaz roller her eyes in amusement, "Yup, you sure do Zim. Totally spooky."

"I am totally right about everything I say because I can doom you if you disagree! I get mad when people don't say my name right and I hate my brother Dib. All I care about are my earth games and I can eat pizza forever!" Zim said in a monotone, gothic voice. For added effect he squinted his eyes like Gaz.

His pitchy inflections combined with his dead on impression should have made Gaz angry. She was sure that with anyone else, they would be dead where they stood but… he really sounded stupid when he tried to match her way of speaking.

So she laughed.

Zim joined in as well, laughing twice as loud as Gaz did, and struggled to grasp his squeedlyspooch. The surrounding citizens gave looks of disapproval and annoyance, but the small duo didn't care.

The alien's street came into view, and their laughter subsequently began to die down. Upon seeing his base, he should have felt relief that he would be out of this rain and yet…

"Finally! We have arrived at my ingenious base of operations. I can't wait to dry myself from this disgusting, smelly rain!" Zim's gloves squeaked as he shook his fists.

Gaz felt...somewhat disappointed. But it was definitely because she wouldn't get to torture Zim anymore. Yeah. That was it.

"Geez, this walk felt like it took forever. I forgot how big of a detour the city district is." Gaz mumbled.

Zim walked up to his fence, before placing a hand in front of Gaz, motioning her to stop. He then commanded, "Gnomes, deactivate. Guest is accompanying."

A small whirring sound came from the gnomes, and their electric eyes turned down, and the gnomes deflated from their alert position. They made their way to the door, neither saying a word to each other as they walked past the tree, the gnomes, or the plastic pink puffer fish. Zim began to raise his hand towards the door, but stopped. From where Gaz stood he seemed unsure of his actions, and he looked around him as if prying eyes were expecting him to finish his task. He turned to Gaz and blinked. She blinked as well.

"Well, I'm here." He said, and rubbed his arms.

"Yeah. This is your house. Your really obviously alien house."

They each gave out a nervous chuckle at her light jest.

"I'm relieved that you didn't end up annoying me as much as I thought you would, Zim." She said, "I'd take you over Dib any day."

"Yes, I prefer your company over Dib's as well. He's not nearly as scary or not-stupid as you are."

They averted their gaze in uncertainty, suddenly interested in the miscellaneous decor around the front yard.

Gaz noticed that Zim was edging a little too close to the end of the umbrella. Any further and he would be soaked again. Clearly, it was the only reason she decided to step forward towards him.

Gaz took in a small breath, not realizing she slightly opened her eyes and said, "Uh, I don't know if you noticed but, when we were walking past Irving I saw this TV shop. Some weather lady announced that the rain would be continuing until thursday."

Zim was startled to see her open her eyes. What did that mean? Was she angry with him again? Yet her tone suggested otherwise. It wasn't so bad to see them, he supposed, if it didn't mean he incurred her wrath. Still, he felt skittish.

He raised his brow in confusion and began, "Ugh, that is so like your planet to be inconvenient that way. It's as if this planet is purposefully is getting in my way. But eh," He began scratching the side of his cheek, "I appreciate this information."

Gaz began playing with her skirt, "Yeah, I just wanted to let you know. I won't wait for you, but if you happen to leave skool the same time as I do, I won't care if you join."

"Um, Gaz?"

Her name rolled off his tongue so casually, and yet he'd never said it without a rude remark. She felt… ugh! what was this feeling? She was Gaz Membrane! Why was she so nervous and confused? She was only saying goodbye to the most annoying alien in the universe!

"What?"she responded, a little too forcefully, eagerly.

"I eh… it's… I have come to realize that I... You are the most tolerable person I've met."

Gaz shakily moved her damp hair out of her eyes, and Zim played with the seams of his gloves. Their eyes skirted back and forth from the yard to each other, realizing that now their faces were somewhat closer in proximity.

"And because you are less annoying, I… I would love to—"

"WELCOME HOME SON!" cried the robot parents, suddenly emerging from the house.

The two screamed in surprise, and Gaz scrambled a few feet back. Her face was hot, and her eyes were wide. Zim took the opportunity to step into the house, and out of the rain. He quickly discarded his disguise to distract himself from his flustered countenance.

"Aw son, i-is that your little enchilada? Look Boby, or boy is finally growing up!" Sputtered the robo-mom, coughing up sparks with ever syllable.

"Ahaha, well y'know Milly, every strapping young boy has to boil some beans and grind his green sauce." The dad-bot quipped, draping his hooked arm around the robo-mom. He closed the front door and both began ramming into the compartment door.

Gir looked up from his TV towards Zim for a second, then yelled, "WOW! You was late by 2 episodes! I thought you died!"

Mini moose emerged from the kitchen, and squeaked, "Nyeh?"

"Oh, y'know, same 'ol same 'ol as the humans say. I killed a hot cat vendor single handedly if that's anything!"

Zim smoothed his aching antennae with his hand, nonchalantly walking towards the couch.

Minimoose gave a questioning, "Nyeh?"

"THAT was that disgusting human sibling of Dib! Trying to spy on my and weaken me! But I tricked her into walking me home! It was very clever, I assure you." Zim looked straight ahead to the TV, refusing to meet Minimoose's eyes.

After some time, Gir spoke up, "Soooo you know how I wanted to make some dumplings for my faaace?"

Zim let in a puff of air and released it in preparation. He knew well how to communicate with Gir about his… past times. "Oh yes, I remember you whining about it for two weeks straight. What about it?"

Gir grabbed the sides of Zim's gave and brought him close and screamed, "Well, the secret ingredient is that lipstick you put all over you when it's wet outside!"

Zim narrowed his eyes in disapproval, and said like a parent scolding their child, "Gir… what did you do?"

He giggled innocently, before letting out a crazed laugh that nearly caused him to wheeze. Gir suddenly stopped and said, "Oh, I used it all." And gave a cheeky grin.

Zim immediately burst, "Gir! I told you to stop eating my resources for defense against the earth! Now how am I going to get home tomor—"

Zim paused and remembered the afternoon. After looking to a pouting Gir and a confused minimoose, Zim plopped back down on the couch and said, "Doh! Man, I won't be able to order new paste until thursday. Ah well. I suppose I can find another route home."

He brought his knees to his face, and crossed his arms over lazily as he stared at the screen, caught in a daze.

"I think I have a less painful, pleasant idea in mind."

-

 **I really enjoyed writing this one. Please tell me your thoughts on it, and hopefully I'll get back to my other works soon before college starts!**


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